Envy: The Ugly Monster That Haunts Moms

I remember reading a quote recently saying something like, “Comparison is the culprit that steals joy.” How true is this?! As a mom, it is easy to compare ourselves to each other. In the world, social media makes it seem as though everyone has it all together and that their lives are pretty close to perfect. In reality, we all know that is not the case but because we are constantly seeing it 24/7, it is embedded in our minds.

“A peaceful heart leads to a healthy body; jealousy is like cancer in the bones” (Proverbs 14:30, New Living Translation).

Currently, I am in the midst of a somewhat tough season of life. I have two kids that are needy in every way. Rowyn is active, wants my attention, wants me to play with her, and still needs me to accomplish many of the tasks she seeks to complete. Finley is completely reliant on me. Because they are so needy, I do not have much time for myself. I get a little breather when my husband is home from work but it still doesn’t change the fact that being a mom requires all of you, 24/7.

“Then I observed that most people are motivated to success because they envy their neighbors. But this, too, is meaningless– like chasing the wind” (Ecclesiastes 4:4, New Living Translation).

During this season, I do not do much for myself outside of working out when I can and at times it can be hard. I see other moms who work outside of the home and at times I envy them. They get to get a break from their kids and have adult conversations. They get to get dressed up outside of sweat pants and t-shirts and look at other scenery besides the same four walls. I see other moms who have girls nights. They have their makeup and hair done and get to talk about life with people they enjoy. I see moms who have date nights or getaways with their husbands. They get dressed up and enjoy food with their favorite person without having to feed two other small mouths and scream at each other over the chaos in the background.

Rowyn and I, 5 months post partum

When I start to have these envious feelings of the other moms I see I have to remember one thing. That thing is that all of these moms have been in MY SEASON! They have all been where I am at in this season of life. They have all been glued to their houses, not able to leave their kids for longer than an hour, not able to look “cute”, not able to have a conversation with their husband alone. Though this season of life can feel overwhelming, it is experienced by every mom and it will pass!

“Once we, too, were foolish and disobedient. We were misled and became slaves to many lusts and pleasures. Our lives were full of evil and envy, and we hated each other” (Titus 3:3, New Living Translation)

Envy is an ugly emotion. It does steal joy. It is easy to be so envious of others that you cannot see the joy and good things surrounding yourself. There are peaks and pits to every season of life and the key is to enjoy the good times and get through the hard times. Do not let the hard times and feelings of living someone else’s “perfect” life, drown out the joy you are experiencing as well!

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